The above painting in PS was inspired by a poem I wrote the other day while sitting in a coffee shop, and letting myself decompress from stress. It's so nice to be able to just sit and let your thoughts wander, not worried about the time or being anywhere but in that moment. Such focus can bring about revelations that have been waiting in the wings for so long.
Thoughts drift up
like feathers dipped
in memories
and scented dreams
our life it seems
is destined to
change in its hue
to something new
transformed
by tears
enmeshed with time
and seeking fly
united by
a dream
a chance
a furtive glance
just to let go
and go beyond
thoughts travel
very far
beyond the stars
and memories
that carry on
long after chorus of
sweet song
Up they lift
a dented heart
and buoy it far
above the noise
the broken toys
and into joy
like summer breeze
in winter's cloak
whispered love
and gentle stroke
into the arms
awaiting me
in thoughts
in dreams
make clear the blur
of every day
the thoughts that play
a melody
of him and me
of us and we
drift up
to see
the light.
like feathers dipped
in memories
and scented dreams
our life it seems
is destined to
change in its hue
to something new
transformed
by tears
enmeshed with time
and seeking fly
united by
a dream
a chance
a furtive glance
just to let go
and go beyond
thoughts travel
very far
beyond the stars
and memories
that carry on
long after chorus of
sweet song
Up they lift
a dented heart
and buoy it far
above the noise
the broken toys
and into joy
like summer breeze
in winter's cloak
whispered love
and gentle stroke
into the arms
awaiting me
in thoughts
in dreams
make clear the blur
of every day
the thoughts that play
a melody
of him and me
of us and we
drift up
to see
the light.
I have been steadily trying to get to that place where all my parts are in sync and functioning as a whole. Mind, body, heart, spirit. The tug of war can be tiring and disconcerting. Focusing in the moment, on every minuscule detail helps. I noticed the pattern the sunlight made on the table. The shadows and pools. I noticed the way the coffee tasted in my mouth, the various flavors that subtly resided in the cup. I noticed the way my spine started to relax and my mind floated along with the pen in my hand. I noticed how the pen felt as I wrote. I noticed each word.
And suddenly, I felt everything melt away. It was not a struggle at all. The struggle has been coming from within me. Suddenly, it all seemed so ridiculous and unnecessary. The confusion, the pain, the worry, seemed so very unreal.
March Break has been just what the doctor ordered so far. I have been reading, catching up with friends and getting out. It's been sunny every day and that helps greatly. I have given myself the time and permission to explore my choices, to assess my strengths and needs. Unhurried and unpressured.
Today, I will be going up to Aurora to work with a friend and co-writer on the books we were commissioned to write. They are not my dream books, but I will make them as dreamy and fun as possible. For one, it will bring in some cash, and for another, it will bring other opportunities.
You see, one of my major dilemmas has been what to do with my writing talent. I have written two novels, but they are not representative of me and who I am. So I let them languish. There are other ideas floating around in my head, but the novel that will truly capture my attention is still waiting in the shadows.
The book that keeps coming back to me is one based on my experience in the chatting world. I spent about five years involved in various chat forums, interviewing people, immersing myself in the "culture", seeing things from a different perspective. In many ways, the experience was enlightening. In others traumatic. I believe I have had enough time and distance from it to be able to write this story. But would anyone be interested in reading it?
I mulled and mused and pondered.
Then, came in the light...
Since I have the luxury these days of going to everyone's blogs and reading everyone else's stories, I came upon this post by Lissa. This particular phrase lit a series of fireworks in my head, "I place my order and send it off to the universe" Aha! Right? It's as simple as that!
I realized that I have been sitting throughout my life with a huge menu in front of me, unable to choose. Unable to sit down and clearly order my meal. Oh, I have made wishes, and intentions, and visualizations. But I had not put in my order!
Sheesh. No wonder I have been so starved!
Well guess what I am doing now? And this goes beautifully with Jamie Ridler's Wishcasting Wednesday! She asks us, "What do you wish to say YES! to?"
Yes! I am placing my order for a full course meal and I am sending it off to the Universe.
Today, I pick from the menu:
- For an appetizer, I would like an order of renewed and solid sense of self, with all my parts united to make a well-oiled, healthy organic goddess.
- For the main course, I would like a career in creative writing/arts that brings in considerable revenue with a huge helping of satisfaction, and a side order of success.
- Accompanying it, I would like a tall glass of community and sharing, bubbling with laughter and enjoyment of every single moment.
- For desert, I would like my soul companion to share a home and a life with, topped with travel, exploration and fun!
- To crown the order, I would like a steaming mug of family and friends that will quench my heart's longing.
Yum!
What would your order be? :)
22 comments:
That sounds like quite a meal. Just what I'd like.
And you know, I was thinking about that push and pull looking for balance... I think that IS the balance. Balance is not immobility, and life never stands still in peace. It's always in motion.
And I so pray you receive it all and then some!
Hey Genie,
Yesterday I started a new adventure - I have begun seeing a counselor/life coach to get some help to get myself back on a path toward purpose. It was our initial meeting yesterday but I got some homework already. She asked me to think about what I would do if some magic wand was waved and I could have the life I would want tomorrow. What would my life be like ? Have to say, I was overwhelmed with this task at first. This is the first time in my life that I feel like a dreamer without a definite dream...
Your words today about chosing from the menu rang so very true with me today !!!! I need to figure out what I really want from the menu, what will fill me up and then I can stop starving my soul ! A huge thank you from you and the universe for your words today, beautiful Genie !
So glad you have this time for re-energizing and being !
Big hugs !
I had to sit and read your poem aloud. I started off reading it silently, but the words just begged to be heard from my mouth. I love your poem! It's beautiful, and brought tears to the corner of my eyes.
I've had those sudden revelations before. All the pain and problems just seem to melt away, and you're left with the content feeling of having no worries. I could use that now. xD
Enjoy your break! I think I've got one next month. Enjoy your order, as well! It sounds filling. =)
I hope you enjoy your meal, Genie! What a delicious order!
I loved your painting and poem...and, of course, your posts are always a delight to read as I find they resonate with me in many ways. You have a magical way with words.
love, light and peace,
serena
Majestic and souring words...
Bon Appetite!
Genie,
May all your wishes and intentions be put out to the Universe. She is always listening. It is truly amazing how life can change once you do this. I will state it again, be careful what you wish for. The Universe has a way of delivering, and sometimes she doesnt spread it over time. She is very very gracious!!! I feel so fortunate for all that I have, and all I did was ask.... love to you!!
As Genie wishes for herself, so I wish also.
And I'm so glad the sun has arrived for your March Break. It's amazing what can be created when some spaciousness arrives.
I'm looking forward to coffee!
As Genie wishes for herself, so I wish for her.
That sounds like an awesome meal. You are so creative and talented. I know this wish and all of your other wishes will come true!
What a scrumptious meal! I'll have what you're having. :)
Your poem is beautiful, Genie. I'm so glad you have this time for reflection, quiet and discovery.
As Genie wishes for herself, so I wish for her.
“As Genie wishes for herself, so I wish for her also.” Wonderful list, so beautifully written!
As Genie wishes for herself, so I wish also.
I'm commenting again just for extra measure. :)
And today I come and get a much needed message from you. Aha that is how the universe works:)
As my Dear, Sweet, Genie Sea As Genie wishes (and sends outs to the universe) for herself, so I wish also.
what a delicious meal you have ordered and I'm sure the Universe will deliver even sooner that you could imagine
may all of your wishes and dreams come true
happy twirls
Cool. A full course meal for Genie with all the trimmings so I also wish for Genie.
What a scrumptious menu! Cheers!
I am glad to hear that you have had some wonderful "me" time to regroup and feel revitalized.
Thank you for the kind comments you posted on my blog. I will certainly keep in mind your generous offer of guidance when I get to the meat and potatoes of teaching. It is nice to know one has a comrade.
Sending you warm wishes,
~Anna
What a dinner!
I can't wait to see what you end up having for breakfast...
As Genie wishes for herself, so I wish also.
This was a beautiful post.
Would you mind if I print this poem out for myself? I keep a poem journal to go to when my heart needs consoling and would love to include this.
I am going to place my order for tomorrow in my morning pages. A full course meal. This feels like a great habit to acquire already.
As Genie wishes for herself, so I wish also.
*sending ginormous cyber hugs*
Rowena - Very true, that push for balance is what life is all about. :)
Tabby - Thank you honey :)
Kim - It's such an awesome step you are taking! I am excited for you :) I am so happy I could help :) YAY!
Tori - Thank you sweetie :) The essence of poetry, I think, is that it needs to be read aloud. :)
Serena - Thank you so much honey :) I am eagerly awaiting my order :)
Shannan - Merci beaucoup mon chérie! :)
Sandy - YAY! You are making me even more excited :)
Meena - Welcome to my blog! Thank you so much :) Don't worry about what to comment or even if to comment. Just enjoy! I am glad you do :)
Jamie - Coffee was uber energizing! I am stoked :)
Gaell - Welcome to my blog Gaell! I'm glad you enjoy reading!, Comment or not as you see fit! It's all good :)
Bree- Thank you honey :) With all you wonderful people helping me with my wish, how can it not come true? :)
Pamela - Okay! I'll make an order for two! :) Thank you sweetie :)
Sema - Thank you! :)
Gail - Thank you and welcome to my blog! :)
Lissa - Thank you honey! You did inspire this post after all :)
Libby - Thank you so much and welcome to my blog! :)
Judi - Thank you honey! I will order one for you as well :) hehe
Anna - Oh yes! Me time is exactly what I need! In fact, I want more and more of it! :) Feel free to hit me up any time for advice or encouragement. :) I know what it's like :) Thank you sweetie :)
Myrope - LOL! I think my breakfast meal will be censored :) *wink wink* Thank you honey :)
Sara - Go right ahead Sara, print the poem! I am honored you want to :) I can't wait to read your order! Hugs! :)
Genie Sea,
This is a wonderful post and your poem~ so so wonderful! Wishing you dreams come true!
I second that order!
Sending light towards your wonderful wishes,
D
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