Box of Creative Goodies

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1. Chronica, 2. Art Supplies, 3. Browsing Magazine and Sipping My Cardamom Tea..., 4. Faro de la Isla de Mouro II (Santander), 5. Tree House, 6. Purple Euphoria, 7. Summer Evening, 8. Art Deco Facade, 9. Twilight / Crepúsculo, 10. Ci sei dentro, 11. Lonely in golden place!, 12. Montmartre

Creative Goodies Meme

I decided to create this meme to get the creative juices going when I languish in the valleys of inspiration.

For each question there are three answers:

Type each answer into Flickr search. Choose an image from only the first page that comes up, then copy and paste each of the URL’s into the mosaic maker .

Et voila! You have your box of Creative Goodies!

1. What three things/objects inspire you to play?
a.
b.
c.

2. What three places invoke a dream state for you?
a.
b.
c.

3. What three artists/artistic styles do you most admire?
a.
b.
c.

4. What three things do you do to lift your energy?
a.
b.
c.

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My answers:

1. What three things/objects inspire you to play?
a. 3D Digitals
b. Art Supplies
c. Magazines

2. What three places invoke a dream state for you?
a. Light houses
b. Tree Houses
c. Purple Sunsets

3. What three artists/artistic styles do you most admire?
a. Magic realism
b. Art Deco
c. Art Nouveau Architecture

4. What three things do you do to lift your energy?
a. Music and dancing
b. Walking
c. Going for a coffee with my journal and a book

If you do it, please feel free to use Mr Linky's widget below, and I will pop on by and cheer your box of creative goodies! :) Make sure you add the post URL not the blog URL. Have FUN! :)

Bi-polar Vision of an "Artist"

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The subject of what makes an artist has been coming up more and more of late. There is no profile of an artist. There are archetypes out there, ones that some of us feel the need to emulate. But, really? They are just one manifestation of an artist.

Being creative is a need. It's like breathing, as essential. It isn't a life style. People often shy away from calling themselves artists, because they feel they haven't earned their stripes. Well, bullshit.

You don't have to be written up in the New Yorker to be an artist. You don't have to have your art framed in a museum to be an artist. You don't have to be a tortured soul living on bread, painting in some attic to be an artist. You are an artist because your soul has the need to create. An apron, a thank you letter, a mouth-watering cookie, a mixed media piece, a happy environment for your kids. Those are creations that bring joy.

This subject has come up so many times in my life. I never thought I was "good" enough to be an artist. My art is nowhere near the caliber of truly accomplished artists. My figures are almost rudimentary and I am still learning. I have a lot to learn. But I have this yearning to create. To create images. To splatter my feelings all over whatever medium I am working with.

Will my artwork sell at ridiculous prices? Will I be the talk to the town? Do I want those things? I would be dishonest not to say, "Yes!" Who wouldn't?

Does it fuel my art? Hell, no. Life fuels my art. And life can be glorious but it can also be painful. Very, very painful.

I am a writer. I wrote before I could talk. This is who I am. I struggled with this all my life. Why? Because being a writer, I felt compelled to write a novel. That's what writers do, right? Wrong. It took me a long time to realize I am not a novelist. I wrote two novels to completion. A harlequin and a "literary" novel. They both stink to high heaven. They are written well; I am a writer after all; but they have the emotional maturity of an embryo. I tossed them aside, feeling like I was a failure as a writer. But that's not true. That is far from the truth. Poetry and non-fiction musings are my mediums of expression. They have always been.

Ideas for novels creep up on me when I am waiting at the check-out, when I am grading a paper, when I am cleaning out my toilet. When I sleep. What the hell? Make up your damn mind woman! Are you or are you not going to write a novel?

The belief that in order to be a successful writer or artist (same thing) you must get paid for it. And certainly, that would be heavenly. To make a living and a good one, writing or painting or both. Or making crafts, or creating sculptures, or mouth-watering recipes, or whatever. Who doesn't want that?

But what of reality? The reality is that for every 500 artists and writers, one makes it to the light of fame. I just pulled that figure out of thin air. I have no bloody clue what the stats are and if there can be reliable stats anyway. I have a problem with stats, but I digress. The point is obvious. Not everyone "makes" it.

What about the rest of us?

The essence is that though we might not make a splash that will be felt around the world, we can make a wave in our part of it. We can express beauty and longing and pathos and victory and worry, and touch others through our creations. Even if it's just one person. Us.

Which leads me to my other concern, so to speak.

Yes, I try to be a positive person. I have had to be. I learned very early in life that if I don't take care of myself, no one else will. That if I do not pick myself up from whatever mire I find myself in, no one will. That the only person I can truly count on is myself. That degree of isolation can be crippling. Can be deadly. There have been times I wished death to come and release me from the constant angst I feel myself drowning in.

Talk about a tortured soul...

But I make myself open the windows of my soul, and let it stream out. In light. In prisms of color. In hope. Because, I am here on this planet for a reason. Aren't I? And even though I have no idea why I am here, I am here. And I will create, and write, and struggle to make things better, and voice my opinions no matter how unpopular they are, and be who I am.

Because.

I cannot be anyone else.

I am a bipolar artist. Not clinically. But certainly.

Blessed be :)

Cycles of life

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First of all I would like to warmly thank Jamie for running yet another amazing book club 12 Secrets. If you don't know Jamie, she is one of the most extraordinary people I have ever met. She walks in light, and emits light to all those around her. A wishstress, a life coach, a creative dynamo, a loving wife and sister, and daughter, and friend, she gives that love to the world by helping us get in touch with our own light, and others whose light is shining bright.

Thank you Jamie :)

The interviews she has set up with other women whose creativity is like a solar impact on the world, truly embody the inspiring soul that Jamie is. This week Jamie interviewed yet another creative fount of inspiration Leah whose "Creative Every Day" project fuels creative exploration and connection.

Thank you Leah :)

With that being said, I am participating in this book club to allow my creative spirit to frolic in the playground with others. Through your blogs, your art and your creative exploration, I am discovering pieces of myself and my creative history that have been forgotten, or lie dormant.

Thank you everyone, whether you are participating in this book club or not, whether you are a woman or a man, thank you :)

The 4th "secret" is about creative cycles.

Creativity, to me, is life. As does life, so does creativity. There are highs; there are lows; there are blahs; there are AHS! But life doesn't cease until it's time to for "that sleep of death, when we have shuffled off this mortal coil" (Hamlet, 3.1), and go on to the next adventure. And even then, I believe, creativity does not end. We are creative souls. Indeed, that is how our souls speak.

How do I deal with the lows? I ride them in glee. I enjoy the scenery, knowing that as with life, there is always another wave coming.

Blessed be :)

List, Lust, Last

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This is another "mixed media" digital piece. I painted the background and the goddess. Then I went hunting for Egyptian brushes that are compatible with my PS dinosaur, but they were humongous so I had to do a lot of recrafting. I am beginning to miss Paint Shop Pro (Corel). It was so much more versatile. I can't for the life of me figure out how to make my own brushes on PS! Anyway, I added a collage piece (the necklace). Et voila! Egyptian goddess. You might notice I have been using blue and yellow combinations a lot lately. These make me happy. :)

Yesterday, I was reminded that, really, all you need to do is ask. As many of you know, we got bombarded by the white stuff, AGAIN. The person that was doing our snow had told us (my neighbor and I) that he no longer had the time to do it. I sat here, working from home all day, and wondered what the hell I was going to do. I decided I would worry about it later. Then, shortly after dinner, someone knocked on my door. Two boys with shovels! One of them a student at the school. You can imagine my glee! Ten bucks later, and the snow was cleared. Thank you Universe! :)

This morning I woke up with a new sense of purpose, a list of goals and a lust for life! Almost ready made, these plans, really, were simmering in the noggin for a while.

I have been pondering what I want to do to maximize my home space. I need to position the living arrangements in order for every room in my house (not that many) to be used to its best capacity. At minimum cost. So here is my home to-do list. I am recording it for myself mostly.

This requires minimum spending: new track lights, energy efficient front door, square table (thrift/garage sale) and folding doors/curtain (thanks Molly!) to separate the front porch from the room for warmth.

This is the first floor plan now:

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This is after:

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The back of the house where the bedroom is now, faces my garden. Wouldn't it be so much better to look out into the garden when I am working or creating than a street? It also faces west, which has the most light. Tada! My super duper economical way of maximizing my space.

Oh. And I am sorry to say, that as much as I adore Mac, I am going to have to go with PC laptop because I simply cannot afford the 500 buck difference.

Tomorrow I will tackle the basement plans! This is fun! Brings me back to the time I wanted to be an architect, interior decorator.

And last, but not least, I am also making plans for my Tarot deck and book, and how to pay off my line of credit. My goal is to retire at 50. Yes, you heard it first here. 50! :)

Words to Images

My wish for today in Jamie's Wishcasting Wednesday is:

For WINTER to be OVER!

To keep myself sane: I painted the following in PS and dabbled in some more poetry. :)

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Foot prints
Paw prints
Their prints merge
Over the lolling
Hilly verge.
White of the sky
Melding with brightness
Smoky breath
Lifts up in lightness.

Foot prints
Paws prints
That crunch
In the ground
The air is still
Steps echo
The sound.

In the snow
There’s a hush
When you know
There’s no rush
The heart beats
Furnace heat
Guiding feet.

Tree tops
Light drops
Stars pop,
First
In the glassy sky
Velvet-gowned
Burst
Retiring diva
Dropping her carat stones
Lazing back
Sparkling throne
Beyond the touch
Diamond snow.

And on the street
Right foot
Left foot
She drums a beat
Of longing
In her head.
And on her feet
Her runners worn
Right foot
Left foot
Her shoe laces torn
Strum on the pavement
With paw pads
A soft arrangement
Of loosely corded song.

She does not see
The shoelaces free
From all restraint
They twirl a dance
In dog eyes, trance
Beyond her gaze
And starlight glaze.

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The pineapple clouds
Heavy laden
Bobbed
Scraping buildings
And towers,
Even lower,
They dropped.

Glancing at them,
Our mouths water
Our minds drift,
Our disillusions
Shatter

Will they break open soon and sluice?
Smile and spill their juice
And deliver us all?

From stale existence
And dry persistence
Of that unmoving wall?

In the puddles they form
Will we jump like children
With umbrellas small?

Suddenly refreshed
From the sterility
of our urban angst
We taste the fullness
Of pineapple lust.

Be strong and blessed be :)

Reflections Melt Ice

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When I stated this blog, I did so as I way to talk to myself. Things happen during the day; thoughts whisper in my brain; feelings churn; sometimes they don't let me sleep. Sending my thoughts out into the universe via satellites and human magic, has been a way to release the things that crowd in me asking to be heard.

It would be nice to sit down with a loved one over a glass of wine or a cup of tea after a long day, to deconstruct our process. Our thoughts. Our feelings. Our victories. Our goals. Our reliefs. Our fears. This blog has become one of my beloved ones.

Then little by little, I found other blogs, and other beloved ones. People who need to express their thoughts, their feelings, their victories, their goals, their reliefs, their fears. They have husbands and children, or children grown, or husbands, or lovers, or friends, or whole families, or no one.

They share their art, their experience, their perspective. Through the satellites and the human magic, they speak.

And I have been drawn to their blogs, your blogs, by your humanity, your creativity, your longing.

I read.

I smile.

I tear.

I laugh.

I gasp at the beauty of your words and images.

I shake my fist at your shadows.

I comment.

I feel. Like. I have a whole world of people to share with. To exchange thoughts with. To be inspired by. And reminded.

No matter where, or who, or why. We all share one purpose. And that is life.

Isn't it wonderful? :)

And So It Is

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Gong Xi Fa Cai (Gong Hay Fat Choy)

Welcome to the Year of the Ox

A time for new beginnings, steady progress and long-lasting relationships.

I can use all of the above. I'm sure you can too. It's time for us to take the leap out of our own restrictions and try a new outlook, a new style, a new modus operandi.

I am still committed to embracing joyful magic.

I will crawl out of the dark tunnel of winter and find warmth and light wherever I can. And if I can't find it, I will make it. If I take two steps back, I will take one leap forward. If my heart is troubled, I will force my lips to smile.

I will do laughter yoga.

I will refill my glass. No more half-full half-empty crap. My glass will be full.

I will take those lemons and chuck them at those who try to give them to me.

I will smooth out the wrinkles and wear my heart on my sleeve.

And if someone doesn't like what I do. They can stuff it. I don't care. They can take their little jokes at my expense, their little put-downs, their judgment, and stuff their pillows with it. See how comfortable it is to sleep on that.

I like me.

May our lows become highs. Our fears, courage. Our nights filled with light. Our arms filled with love. :)

Showers of Gratitude

To shiny objects
our attention drifts
and hangs on
with dreamy bliss

What catches our eye? Captivates our focus? Fuels our imagination? Makes our heart soar? Pumps blood through our veins like a mighty river?

Let me start by saying. This community fascinates me to no end. Your creations. Your thoughts. Your struggles. Your victories. Your quiet moments. Your days of bliss. Your tireless search for beauty and light, meaning and direction. Your care and support for others. Your presence.

Before I even think about what fascinates me, I want to thank you all, for being.

I got three awards recently by two wonderful women in our community. There are rules to these awards, but I will break them. If you want to see them, I will provide links to their amazing posts, and you can read for yourselves. :)

Paula is a woman whose energy and love of life is greater than all the oceans put together. She is a loving wife, and a wonderful mother to two amazing children. Her photographs speak volumes of her love of life and her quest for meaning. They are captivating! She extends this light and joy to others through her comments and suggestions. I am also honored to announce that Paula is our newest contributor to my blog-zine Ola! Moana. Please take some time and show her some love.

Paula gave me this award: Thank you Paula! :)


This award is given to commentators who show support, inspiration and encouragement to others. I bestow this award to each and every one of YOU. Your comments are a continuous source of fascination for me. This is not a cop out on my part. It's not that I can't be bothered to pick five. It's that I cannot pick. Each and every one of you whether you comment once or every day, have given me a precious gift, and I would like to honor you. Thank you. :)

Please feel free to grab this badge and give it to someone or everyone who has encouraged you! :)

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The other two awards were given to me by June. June is a wonderful source of inspiration. A wife, a mother, and a grandmother, June not only creates beautifully whimsical art and unique jewelry, she prompts others' creativity through themes on the Dark Side. She is a supportive and caring blogger who takes the time to honor others' creativity as well. Please take the time and visit her with some love. :)

June gave me these two awards: Thank you June! :)



This award I pass on again to each and every one of YOU. From cookies to earrings. From watercolor to paper. Your creativity springs forth from you like the fountain of life. You inspire thought with your images and words. You are simply wonderful.


And this! Thank you June! :)

This badge is one great big HUG for each and every one of you for being here. For caring. For being YOU! Thank you! :) Feel free to grab the badge and spread your hugs!

Please grab the badges and sport them with pride. I give them to you with love! :)

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Speaking of spreading the love. I have a gift to give to one special person who I have met through the blogosphere. She is a warrior, brave in her conviction, overcoming obstacles and doing so with honesty and bravado. She is an inspiration to others in oh so many ways, so I made this mantra card for her to honor her recent birthday.

So without further ado, this card is for our Sacred, and beloved Suzie!

For those of you who don't know, this is Suzie's personification of her creative spirit Cinnamon! This is how I see her.

Happy Birthday Suzie! May all your dreams come true! :)

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Of course Cinnamon's setting is the kitchen! That is her seat of power! Her weapon of choice, the wooden spoon is not her only tool. On her utensil belt she carries all the tools of her majestic creativity. Through the windows, you can see the stunning vista of Cinnamon's beloved British Columbia. :)

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Steve Emery awarded me with the Six Random Meme. Steve is an amazing artist and person. His honesty, integrity, thoughtfulness, creativity and intelligence shine through his words and watercolors. Please take some time to visit Steve, and be prepared to be absolutely captivated. Thank you Steve!

Six random things about me:

1) I have visited every single type of church, temple, or synagogue at least once, in my quest for spiritual meaning. I chose not to be part of any religious institution, with respect.

2) I always doodle flowers and eyes when I am bored, to stay alert.

3) I make a wicked chai from scratch! It's something I inherited from my Egyptian roots.

4) I got my first gray hair at age 18, and it started out as a strand of golden tinsel. Yes, like the one on Christmas trees. It was gold for three days, then turned gray.

5) I made my first necklace when I was four.

6) I have had prophetic dreams of people and places which I encountered later in my life.

That's it for now! Phew!

I award this meme to each and every one of you again. Why? Because I am fascinated with people's life details. :) So if you want to participate please feel free! :)

I know. I'm such a rule-breaker. :)

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Oh right. I forgot. I was supposed to be writing about my fascinations. I will. But not now. :)

For now, I will post an image I worked on yesterday. Yet more experimentation in a different style. :)

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Blessed be :)

Confessions of a Risk-Taker

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First of all let me start by confessing, I did not read the 3rd chapter of 12 Secrets. I have been too busy these past few days, and my brain threatened to short-circuit. I have started reading some of your blogs, however, which I found, as usual, most inspiring and uplifting.

So. Risk.

Getting up in the morning is a risk. No one knows what the day will bring. We take risks all the time: emotional risks, professional risks, interpersonal risks, creative risks. We risk every time we open our mouths to speak our opinion, or our feelings. Because no one can know the outcome.

Life is a risk.

Is that a bad thing? I don't think so. If we didn't risk, we wouldn't be able to speak or think, or create. We would still be living in dark caves, grunting responses. No invention, no discovery, no monumental event has happened without risk.

So what I have I risked?

At 16, I left my parents home because I could no longer take the tyranny of their oppressive rules. I went to Greece and attended University there. I sold my piano, for my tuition, and I worked to support myself. I sold jewelry on the streets. I was a bar tender. I was a waitress. I worked at a flower crafts factory. I tutored spoiled kids in English.

At 20, I returned to Montreal to pursue my Masters. I got a loan. I worked as a waitress, a cashier, and a bar tender. I tutored spoiled kids in Math and English. By 22, I was disillusioned with academia and decided I was going to pursue teaching as my career.

I lived with roommates, and stumbled into the world of dating and "love". I risked my heart, and my health in a string of unwise relationships, because I was naive and untrained. I was raised in a very sheltered way, and I had not really had the chance to interact with boys and men in a gradual way. My learning curve was non-existent at the time.

At 23, diploma in hand, I left Montreal to come to Toronto. I had no family or friends here. I stayed with my then ex-boyfriend's cousin for a year, as a live-in nanny, while I got my feet on the ground. The risk? Her boyfriend was a big time drug dealer with drug dealing friends and "clients". After escaping being murdered and raped, I moved again. By then, I was working at a language school until I got my Ontario credentials. I moved into my first apartment.

A couple of years later, I risked marriage to a sweet man who turned out to have no ambition and a big heroin/cocaine problem. Four years later, I left him and started yet again.

I risked meeting a man who I found through an online dating site. We had fallen deeply in love. I risked my heart. Only to find out he was married. I walked away. Goddesses don't work that way.

Then I risked it again with another man. It didn't work out.

And again with another. (Did I mention I have a slow learning curve?) He proposed. He was going to move here from the states. It was all set. He backed out at the last minute. The risk was too high for him. My heart petrified. My learning curve stalled.

In that time, I bought my first home, way too big for me, but beautiful, by myself, on a wing and a prayer. Two years after that, I sold it at a profit and bought my current, much smaller and cozier home.

I took two years leave without pay, to pursue my dream of starting my own magazine. I spent all my savings; my partner backed out; but, I kept it alive for a year by myself, then admitted defeat. I went back to teaching.

This is the skeleton of my risk taking.

Now?

I risk every time I post a blog about myself, my thoughts, my feelings, my struggles. I don't know who is reading this and how they will take it. I don't know how I will be judged. I often ask myself, "What makes your life so interesting that others need to read it?" Nothing. But if anyone, just one person, will gain solace or understanding from my blog, then the risk is worth it.

I risk every time I post my art work or poetry on this blog. To my infinite surprise, people have been most kind and supportive. And when they have nothing good to say, they say nothing at all. I love that about you.

Now, in my 40th year, or is it 41st, I ask myself, "What risks are you going to take?"

The answer? I have no blessed idea.

Right now, I am coasting through turbulent waters. There are spectacularly clear patches, and there are muddy patches. All I know is, I wake up every morning, and I risk. At work, I am trying to reorganize a department in near shambles and there is some resistance, and some resentment. But when the dust clears, there is gratitude. In my life, I try to smile and put myself out there in the hope that my heart will not be demolished again, by anyone.

So yeah, I am no stranger to risk. What is strange to me is the Hollywood ending that risk brings. Yet, I still risk the chance that one day, I too, will get it. :)

Mermaid's Chorus

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In waters deep
She swims
She flies
She loves
salt water
in her eyes
She dreams
She longs
for ocean
skies
deep coral
grooves
that multiply.
The shadows
of top beings
drift
and to the surface
her dark eyes lift
and wonders what
and who
and why
these beings try
to obscure
the sky
The fins that whisper
a warning wave
She sees top beings
sink to their graves
deep in the heart
of ocean blue
they drop through weeds
and fall from view.
The dolphin song
make her lips smile
she rests
and listens
for a while.
Her mermaid call
they answer swift
and through the currents
together drift
and dream as one
for days so calm
when the top beings
don't cause harm
to fish
to plant
to salty deep
they sing together
until they sleep.