The Goal not the Goal Post

Welcome to Twenty Ten!

It's 1:30 am, and I have just returned home from a quiet, relaxing evening with friends, and my godson, 7 month old Tristan.

I loved being out late tonight, because I witnessed a spectacular evening.

The moon is full and beautiful, the first full moon of 2010; and it has been drizzling all night. These two natural phenomena have caused the ground to sparkle like a myriad of diamond slivers, and the sky to glow. It's a magical night, to be sure. It's a night filled with promise. A great omen indeed.

This year, I open, not with resolutions or words; I open with goals. Some, I will keep to myself, not as a mystery but as precious promise to me, undiluted by not letting it go out into the world. Yet.

There are a few goals I do wish to share, however.

The first goal is to finish the text that will accompany my Tarot deck. It's been fermenting in my mind for some time now, writing itself in my head, so to speak; it's time for it to come out. :)

The second goal is to start and complete a new art project. Yes, I will be taking it to paper. It's a series of sketches entitled The Genie in the Sea. They will each be accompanied by a poetic prose. More on that later. :)

My third goal is to blog more.

My blogging has fallen a bit by the wayside, partly because I have been busy, but mostly because, I felt I had nothing really to say. Nothing new anyway. I realize that might be somewhat of a skewed perception on my part, and a bit of performance anxiety. I did feel however, bereft of direction in the blogging world.

It's a new year now, with fresh possibilities. We have universal permission to let go of the past and start anew.

The first thing I would like to eliminate is pressure, external and internal. It's time to unshackle myself from unrealistic and impossible expectations, and bask in the freedom that I have to do as I please. It's a luxury. I am well aware of it. One that I am immensely grateful for, one that I do not wish to squander.

In blogging regularly, I maintain a contact not only with others, but with myself. A self-reflection that I share with others. It will be the sharing that adds a certain ingredient to the telling of the tale. We all know tales are meant to be told, not kept in locked boxes.

Whether it be an observation I have made in the course of the day, that makes my mind churn, or whether it is a report on my progress through my goals, I need to make this daily date with myself to write. To write as if no one is reading. To write because I must. Because writing has always been a part of me. Because the spoken word can be careless, can drift aimlessly in the air and be lost. Because without writing there is silence. And the time for silence has not come yet, for me.

These are my first thoughts of 2010. And they are here. In black and white.

It's going to be a great year. Of this I am sure. Happy New Year! :)